Nov 18: The Land Before Time, Jingle All the Way, Little Golden Books
Plus a Half Baked sequel? And Pippen's ex-wife dating Jordan's son?
The ‘80s & ‘90s pop culture you loved, forgot, or never knew existed
November 18th, 2022 • Issue 126
This week in the ‘80s and ‘90s
November 18th
34 years ago, on November 18th, 1988, The Land Before Time hit theaters.
The Land Before Time has unexpected similarities to the Fast and the Furious franchise.
And not just because The Land Before Time and Fast and Furious celebrate how your close friends become your family, particularly as you forge bonds through shared, high-stakes adventures.
No… it’s because both launched gigantic movie franchises where new movies increasingly bear little to no resemblance to the debut film.
Other than “dinosaurs, and some of the same characters” for The Land Before Time and “cars are involved usually, and some of the same characters” for Fast and the Furious — yeah, there’s not much else.
The Land Before Time is not a musical. All 13 of its sequels are.
The Land Before Time was released in theaters. All 13 of its sequels were direct-to-video.
The Land Before Time came from Steven Spielberg and George Lucas. They weren’t involved in any of its 13 sequels.
Although one thing the Land Before Time sequels have in common with the debut film: They’re about as short as something can be to still qualify as a feature-length movie. The Land Before Time clocked in at a mere 69 minutes — making it one of the shortest movies ever in theaters. Its sequels are usually around 70 to 80 minutes, well short of the traditional 90-minute standard.
The Land Before Time really solidified the blueprint of taking a film franchise, moving it direct to video (or now VOD/streaming), hemorrhaging the big-name talent in front of and behind the camera, and milking it for all it’s worth. I mean, they did it with American Pie movies. And Bring It On. And Air Bud. And A Cinderella Story. And pretty much every Disney cartoon.
The Land Before Time just had fewer theatrical releases and way more sequels than most franchises that make the theater-to-VOD transition.
And most of those franchises start with a more beloved original (the film that came out today did pretty well but wasn’t a cultural phenomenon by any means).
Hollywood probably would’ve eventually figured out this business model. But The Land Before Time was the one that did.
1983 - A Christmas Story hit theaters.
1985 - Joe Theismann’s leg was gruesomely broken during a game.
1985 - Voltron aired its series finale.
1990 - C&C Music Factory’s single Gonna Make You Sweat was released.
1991 - U2’s album Achtung Baby was released.
1992 - The Contest episode of Seinfeld was released.
1992 - The Malcolm X film hit theaters.
1993 - The WWF’s Vince McMahon was charged with steroid distribution.
1993 - Eddie Vedder was arrested for public drunkenness.
1994 - The Miracle on 34th Street remake hit theaters.
1995 - The Rolling Stones became the first major musical act to livestream a concert on the internet.
1997 - The Titanic soundtrack was released.
1998 - The Powerpuff Girls premiered.
2000 - Catherine Zeta-Jones and Michael Douglas were married.
2000 - Destiny’s Child’s single Independent Women hit number one.
2001 - The Nintendo GameCube was released in North America.
November 19th
1980 - CBS banned the infamous Brooke Shields Calvin Klein jeans ad.
1988 - Bon Jovi’s single Bad Medicine hit number one.
1989 - The U.S. secured its first World Cup berth since 1950.
1990 - The Divinyls single I Touch Myself was released.
1990 - Milli Vanilli’s Grammy Award was stripped in the wake of their lip syncing revelation.
1992 - The Simpsons episode “Mr. Plow” premiered.
1992 - Dr. Dre’s single Nuthin’ But a ‘G’ Thang was released.
1993 - Addams Family Values hit theaters.
1995 - No Doubt’s single Spiderwebs was released.
1995 - The Baltimore Stallions became the first and only U.S. team to win the Canadian Football League’s Grey Cup.
1996 - Prince’s three-CD album Emancipation was released.
1999 - Toy Story 2 and The World Is Not Enough hit theaters.
1999 - The first person won the full $1 million on Who Wants to be a Millionaire?
November 20th
36 years ago, on November 20th, 1986, the one billionth Little Golden Book was printed (it was a copy of The Poky Little Puppy).
It’s not surprising the one billionth Little Golden Book was The Poky Little Puppy — probability dictated that.
The Poky Little Puppy, one of the original 10 Little Golden Books published in 1942, has a claim at the bestselling children’s book in U.S. history.
As of 2001, it sold 15 million copies and claimed the top spot. Unfortunately, these sales numbers are near impossible to find since then. The Poky Little Puppy still has some potential for a claim, though others, in particular Harry Potter books, have had two decades close the gap.
At some point, The Poky Little Puppy does pass in front of every kid. After all, the book costs a few bucks — and every child’s grandparents or parents remember their turn with The Poky Little Puppy when they were kids.
That said, I’m not sure anyone remembers much about the book or has a deep fondness for the story. It’s like the Avatar or Filet-O-Fish of children’s books.
And that’s true across the board for Little Golden Books. Considering their sales numbers and longevity it’s at least somewhat surprising they haven’t found their way into other mediums. The Poky Little Puppy had one animated Christmas special, in 1992.
Tootle, Scuffy the Tugboat, and the rest are similar paradoxes — they’ve sold millions of copies to multiple generations yet barely made an blip.
Someone needs to get on creating a Little Golden Books Cinematic Universe quick. Then the Little Golden Books might start counting their sales numbers in quantities of billions again.
1982 - “The Play” — one of the most memorable moments in college football history — took place.
1982 - Drew Barrymore hosted Saturday Night Live at age seven.
1983 - The apocalyptic TV movie The Day After aired on ABC and was watched by 100 million people.
1984 - SETI was founded.
1985 - Windows 1.0 shipped.
1987 - Teen Wolf Two hit theaters.
1990 - LL Cool J’s single Around the Way Girl was released.
1992 - Home Alone 2 hit theaters.
1998 - Enemy of the State and A Bug’s Life hit theaters.
2001 - Josh Groban’s self-titled debut album was released.
November 21st
1980 - Dallas answered, “Who shot J.R.?”
1981 - Olivia Newton-John’s single Physical hit number one.
1982 - The NFL returned after a 57-day strike.
1983 - The Thriller video premiered in movie theaters.
1986 - An American Tail hit theaters.
1987 - The finale of She-Ra aired.
1987 - Billy Idol’s single Mony Mony hit number one.
1989 - Smoking was banned on U.S. domestic flights.
1990 - Three Men and a Little Lady hit theaters.
1991 - The Flamin’ Moe’s episode of The Simpsons premiered.
1992 - Sonic the Hedgehog 2 was released, changing video game release cycles permanently.
1995 - Coolio’s album Gangsta’s Paradise was released.
1995 - The Beatles Anthology 1, featuring the new single Free As a Bird, was released.
1995 - Green Day’s Billie Joe Armstrong was arrested for dropping his pants at a concert.
November 22nd
26 years ago, on November 22nd, 1996, Jingle All the Way hit theaters.
There’s a cynical irony with Jingle All the Way, the most famous cinematic ode to the American tradition of Christmas shopping brawls.
As much as Jingle All the Way was pitched as a satire of the onset madness parents exhibit in search of the season’s hottest toy and a commentary on the commercialization of Christmas — the movie itself was guilty of attempting to harness both.
The movie was rushed into production in February of 1996 when Arnold Schwarzenegger’s schedule had a sudden opening following the postponement of a Planet of the Apes remake in which he was set to star. (Sinbad, I assume, was more readily available.)
The studio then turned around the movie in near-record time — it filmed in mid-April and hit theaters on this day in November. Because, of course, they wanted to capitalize on the commercial potential of the holiday season (and not have to wait around a full year to do so).
That’s not all. In the movie, Arnold and Sinbad battle over a toy called Turbo-Man. As a merchandising tie-in, the people behind Jingle All the Way actually produced real Turbo-Man action figures — hoping on some level, no doubt, that art would imitate life. And hoping the toy would become the hottest of the season — even if that meant parents might brawl over Turbo-Man.
But reality intervened and crushed that hypocritical dream. The 1996 Christmas season just so happened to be the Tickle Me Elmo year… the most sought-after holiday toy since Cabbage Patch Kids 13 years earlier. Plus, with the rushed schedule of Jingle All the Way production, they couldn’t mass produce Turbo-Man, get it on every shelf in every store, and drive hype around it.
As for the movie itself, Jingle All the Way was a mid-level success. It grossed $129 million worldwide against its $75 million budget. But it was nowhere close to the commercial success, either as a holiday film or toy sales driver, that the team behind it was hoping for.
1986 - Mike Tyson became the youngest heavyweight boxing champ ever.
1986 - Human League’s single Human hit number one.
1989 - Back to the Future: Part II hit theaters.
1990 - Freddie Mercury issued a statement confirming he had AIDS.
1991 - The Addams Family and An American Tail: Fievel Goes West both hit theaters.
1991 - TLC’s single Ain’t Too Proud to Beg was released.
1995 - Toy Story and Casino both hit theaters.
1997 - INXS’s Michael Hutchence died of suicide.
2000 - Unbreakable hit theaters.
November 23rd
1983 - Terms of Endearment hit theaters.
1984 - Boston College quarterback Doug Flutie threw a famous Hail Mary to beat Miami.
1988 - Scrooged hit theaters.
1990 - MTV banned Madonna’s video for Justify My Love.
1991 - Michigan’s Desmond Howard struck a Heisman pose when scoring a touchdown.
1991 - Michael Bolton’s single When a Man Loves a Woman hit number one.
1993 - The Food Network debuted.
1993 - Snoop Doggy Dogg’s debut album Doggystyle was released.
1993 - The Atari Jaguar was released.
1996 - Merril Bainbridge’s one hit Mouth peaked at number four and Cake’s The Distance peaked at 35.
1997 - Matchbox 20’s single 3 AM was released.
1998 - Will Smith’s single Miami was released.
1998 - Carmen Electra and Dennis Rodman announced they were annulling their marriage after just over a week.
November 24th
1988 - Mystery Science Theater 3000 premiered on a local TV channel in Minneapolis.
1990 - The ill-advised “Running Zack” episode of Saved by the Bell aired.
1991 - Freddie Mercury passed away at age 45.
1993 - Mrs. Doubtfire hit theaters.
1994 - Dan Marino became the first quarterback to fake a spike and throw a pass instead.
1996 - The Tick aired its series finale.
1998 - Sarah McLachlan’s single Angel was released.
1998 - America Online purchased Netscape for $4.2 billion.
5 ‘80s and ‘90s trivia facts
Ray Romano’s slow joke delivery is the reason Joe Rogan is a thing today.
Ray Romano was originally cast as the electrician on NewsRadio in 1994. Bout after two days of rehearsals, the producers decided to fire him — because they didn’t like his slow joke delivery.
The producers replaced him with an actor named Greg Lee for the pilot… then canned him and replaced him with Joe Rogan. He held onto the part for the entire five-season run.
Charles Schulz of the “Peanuts” was inducted into the U.S. Hockey Hall of Fame in 1993 — despite not playing professional hockey.
Schulz loved hockey his whole life — and regularly had Snoopy play hockey. So the Hall of Fame decided to induct him for his contributions to the sport.
Arnold Schwarzenegger never blinks in Terminator 2: Judgment Day.
It was by design, not just, like, he forgot to blink on camera.
There was a close call for the first movie ever to have a promotional website.
In October 1994, Stargate just beat out Star Trek Generations for the first-ever promotional website for a movie.
The Spice Girls were the first British act to have their debut album hit number one in the U.S.
Spice debuted at number six in February 1997, then worked its way up to number one after 14 weeks on the charts.
It would remain the only British album to achieve that feat in the U.S. until One Direction’s debut album in 2012. And theirs started at number one.
Everything old is new again
A look at the reboots, revivals, throwbacks, retro insights, and nostalgia in the news
Half Baked 2!? A sequel to 1998’s Half Baked just wrapped shooting in Louisiana. The only cast members from the original movie to return are Rachel True and Harland Williams.
NBC is bringing back “The More You Know” — but instead of 30-second life lessons these will be five- to nine-minute shorts on Peacock.
There’s a remake of 1981’s Escape to New York in the works, likely without Kurt Russell.
Facebook/Meta announced a virtual Notorious B.I.G. concert coming to the metaverse on December 16th. The online reactions are what you’d expect.
The True Lies reboot TV show will be part of CBS’s midseason schedule, premiering February 23rd.
The dramatic reboot of The Fresh Prince of Bel-Air is running it back. The trailer is out for the second season of Bel-Air, which will stream on Peacock on February 23rd.
The Jordan-Pippen rivalry just took quite a turn. Scottie Pippen’s 48-year-old ex-wife is now dating Michael Jordan’s 31-year-old son.
Disney+ has stopped editing out Daryl Hannah’s post-mermaid-to-human butt in Splash.
The house from A Christmas Story in Cleveland, Ohio, is up for sale. And just in time for the new sequel, A Christmas Story Christmas, which came out yesterday on HBO Max.
Also, the apartment above the book store from Notting Hill in West London is also for sale.
Here’s a never-before-seen deleted scene from Planes, Trains and Automobiles. It’s part of an upcoming 35th anniversary Blu-Ray.
A guitar Kurt Cobain smashed on stage in 1989 sold at auction for $486,000.
Ke Huy Quan, who played Short Round in Indiana Jones and the Temple of Doom, says he still gets a Christmas gift from Steven Spielberg every year.
Mike Tyson and Evander Holyfield are selling a line of weed edibles called Holy Ears — a clear reference to their 1997 boxing match of ear-biting infamy.
Kevin Conroy, the voice of Batman in the ‘90s Batman: The Animated Series, passed away last Thursday from cancer at age 66. And Gallagher, the watermelon-smashing comedy star of the ‘80s, passed away last Friday at age 76.
Recommendations of the week
The ‘80s & ‘90s pop culture you loved
A dedicated group of archivists just put all 285 issues of Nintendo Power on Archive.org. Somehow they’re still up three days later, so maybe Nintendo’s notorious cease-and-desist team is asleep at the switch?
The ‘80s & ‘90s pop culture you forgot
Edible Arrangements started in 1999. Here’s their origin story. Plus how they’ve managed to grow and thrive since then as the go-to fruit basket franchise in the U.S.
The ‘80s & ‘90s pop culture you never knew existed
Here’s an interview to learn more about Steve from Blue’s Clues than you ever thought possible.
Have a great week!
-Sam
The Nintendo Power's have already been taken down.