July 16: Kokomo, Guns N' Roses, the Funky Bunch
Plus Dinosaurs, Woodstock '99, Ali at the '96 Olympics, and more
The Retro
by 11 Points
Modern perspectives on ‘80s and ‘90s nostalgia
July 16th, 2021 • Issue 56
This week in nostalgic history
July 16th
30 years ago, on July 16th, 1991 - Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch’s single Good Vibrations was released.
Mark Wahlberg’s lighthearted Vanilla Ice 2.0 pop rap career, which kicked off this day 30 years ago, almost certainly never would’ve gotten off the ground in the social media era. The formation of Marky Mark and the Funky Bunch came less than three years after a 16-year-old Wahlberg was convicted of assaulting two Vietnamese men (which happened a year after another racially-motivated crime, that against three Black children). That information was not widely known in the public in 1991, when Good Vibrations came out; instead, Wahlberg’s biggest shame in the public’s eye was he was the brother of New Kids on the Block’s Donnie Wahlberg. (Mark has publicly apologized several times for “those horrific acts” since. The crimes, not the Donnie Wahlberg element.)
Mark’s career as a rapper was short, although he and the Funky Bunch came out of the gate surprisingly strong. Good Vibrations was a number one single, the follow-up Wildside was a number 10 single, and the album Music For the People went platinum. The Funky Bunch would release one more album the following year, then disbanded in 1993 as Mark slowly made the transition into acting.
Also on July 16th: Datsun changed its name to Nissan (1981)… Dollywood opened (1986)… Free Willy and Hocus Pocus hit theaters (1993)… Baseball Night in America premiered (1994)… Amazon.com launched, selling books online (1995)… Eyes Wide Shut and the Blair Witch Project hit theaters (1999)… John F. Kennedy Jr. was killed in a plane crash (1999)
July 17th
37 years ago, on July 17th, 1984 - The drinking age in the U.S. was changed from 18 to 21 nationwide.
Ronald Reagan signed the National Minimum Drinking Age Act into effect on this day because he felt the states couldn’t be trusted with their rights to make their own decisions on the drinking age. He also told states they would receive less government funding for highways if they failed to abide by the new minimum drinking age. But beyond hashtag he was a socialist, and as much as the 21-year-old drinking age is the bane of many an older teenager’s existence, this Act was ultimately a good decision in the interest of public health. Studies have since proven that raising the legal drinking age does reduce deaths and fatal accidents; in 1984, that was unproven.
The U.S., of course, still maintains the legal drinking age of 21 today, giving the country one of the highest drinking ages in the world (and the highest amongst the developed countries).
Also on July 17th: Soft Cell’s one hit, Tainted Love, peaked at number 8 on the Billboard Hot 100 (1982)… Robocop hit theaters (1987)… Color Me Badd’s single I Adore Mi Amor (the inspiration for the “thanks for subscribing” email you get from this newsletter) was released (1991)… Honey, I Blew Up the Kid hit theaters (1992)… Brazil won the men’s World Cup (1994)… Multiplicity hit theaters (1996)… The Mask of Zorro hit theaters (1998)… the series finale of Family Matters aired (1998)… Destiny’s Child’s single Bills, Bills, Bills hit number one (1999)
July 18th
33 years ago, on July 18th, 1988 - The Beach Boys single Kokomo was released.
Kokomo was really my formal introduction to the Beach Boys as a kid; while I’d absorbed some of their famous hits by osmosis, Kokomo was their new song that resonated with a new generation. It also took me many years to figure out Kokomo isn’t a real place; I mean, all they do is shout out real Caribbean islands in the song, how was I to know the only imaginary one was the one in the title?
One other Kokomo anecdote from my youth: During (mandatory) choir at my school, we were slated to performed Kokomo as a concert. But shortly after we began rehearsing, outrage struck as someone became worried about a bunch of kids singing the line “tropical drink melting in your hand.” So the school changed the lyrics to “ice cream cone melting in your hand.” To this day I still sing that line in my head whenever I hear Kokomo.
Also on July 18th: Prince’s single Let’s Go Crazy/Erotic City was released (1984)… liens hit theaters (1986)… Whitney Houston married Bobby Brown (1992)… Hootie & the Blowfish released the single Hold My Hand (1994)… Crayola introduced scented crayons (1994)… Seal’s single Kiss from a Rose was released for the first time, in the U.K. (1994)… Selena’s album Dreaming of You was released posthumously (1995)… the Los Angeles Lakers signed Shaquille O’Neal (1996)… the Seattle Mariners held a “Turn Ahead the Clock” night (1998)
July 19th
25 years ago, on July 19th, 1996 - Muhammad Ali lit the Olympic flame during the opening ceremony in Atlanta.
The 1992 Olympics in Barcelona, Spain, featured some iconic moments, but one of the most enduring occurred during the opening ceremony, when an archer shot a flaming arrow to the top of the stadium to ignite the Olympic flame.
The 1996 Olympics in Atlanta realized there was no topping that. So they didn’t try. (Unlike China in 2008, which tried to reset the bar for opening ceremonies by having approximately 15,000 people put on a synchronized drumming performance while using a weather machine to control the rain.)
So rather than going huge — which is basically what the world expected from the Americans — the ceremony went small and poignant. A handful of prominent athletes of the time (like Evander Holyfield and Janet Evans) carried the torch around the stadium, then handed it to Muhammad Ali who lit the flame.
In going understated and not trying to outdo 1992, the Atlanta Olympics managed to create its own iconic opening ceremony moment — one that appears in virtually every Olympics montage and will almost certainly appear in one before the Olympics kick off on Friday.
Also on July 19th: The summer Olympics opened in Russia, with the U.S. boycotting (1980)… Billy Joel’s single It’s Still Rock and Roll to Me hit number one (1980)… Genesis’s single Invisible Touch hit number one (1986)… Bill and Ted’s Bogus Journey hit theaters (1991)… Billy Joel’s last real studio album, River of Dreams, was released (1993)… ceiling tiles collapsed at Seattle’s Kingdome (1994)… Clueless hit theaters (1995)… Road Rules premiered on MTV (1995)… Kazaam and Trainspotting hit theaters (1996)… the series finale aired of Tales from the Crypt (1996)
July 20th
27 years ago, on July 20th, 1994 - The series finale of Dinosaurs aired.
The TGIF show Dinosaurs has a famous finale — one whose fame probably outstrips the show’s popularity — because it just might be the darkest series finale of all time. Yeah, even more than that Six Feet Under finale where they flashed forward into the future so we could see in excruciating, Sia-scored detail how every character died.
That’s because the series finale of Dinosaurs is… the extinction of the dinosaurs. Like, in the final image from the show, they’re all getting buried in snow from the Ice Age. And that’s not all. The show also makes it clear that the dinosaurs’ reckless actions toward the environment cause the Ice Age. Good for the show for going there, but damn, that’s an aggressive way to end a family show where the signature character was a goofy, catchphrase-spewing baby dinosaur.
Also on July 20th: Vanessa Williams was asked to resign as Miss America after nude photos were published in Penthouse (1984)… The NeverEnding Story was released (1984)… Revenge of the Nerds hit theaters (1984)… EMF’s single Unbelievable hit number one (1991)… DJ Jazzy Jeff and the Fresh Prince’s Boom Shake the Room was released (1993)… OJ Simpson offered a reward for the capture of the “real killers” (1994)… Will Smith’s single Just the Two of Us was released (1998)… the Y2K act went into effect (1999)
July 21st
34 years ago, on July 21st, 1987 - Guns N’ Roses debut album, Appetite for Destruction, was released.
Guns N’ Roses was a band that came out of the L.A. rock scene and one that always had a variety of issues — like Tracii Guns leaving the band that bore his name before they could even record any music. But finally, in 1987, they managed to keep it together long enough for Geffen Records to put out the band’s debut album. And… it didn’t sell very well, getting lost in a very crowded sea of rock albums of the time.
But Guns N’ Roses kept performing and playing, and Geffen kept lobbying to get the music on the radio and MTV. Finally, in 1988, songs like Welcome to the Jungle, Paradise City, and Sweet Child o’ Mine started really catching on. Just over a year after the album was released, it would hit number one on the Billboard 200 — where it would remain for almost 150 weeks. Today, it’s the 11th best-selling album in U.S. history and the top-selling debut album ever.
And more important, Guns N’ Roses has always stayed true to their roots, occasionally cranking out music while spending most of their time having issues on top of issues on top of issues.
Also on July 21st: Mary Hart of Entertainment Tonight famously had her legs insured (1987)… “Weird Al” Yankovic’s only feature film, UHF, was released (1989)… Do the Right Thing hit theaters (1989)… Glenn Medeiros’s single She Ain’t Worth It hit number one (1990)… Pink Floyd performed The Wall at the former site of the Berlin Wall (1990)… the controversial movie Kids was released (1995)… Wayne Gretzky signed with the New York Rangers (1996)… Eagle Eye Cherry’s debut album, Desireless, was released (1998)… Apple’s iBook was released, featuring wireless networking (1999)
July 22nd
22 years ago, on July 22nd, 1999 - The disastrous Woodstock ‘99 music festival began.
Woodstock ‘99 is infamous (not even infamous enough, although a documentary which premieres tomorrow on HBO may reignite the sentiment).
Looking back on the festival in retrospect, it’s hard not to see it as an allegory of everything we see playing out on a larger scale today. The conditions caused by the unabashed and unrelenting greed of the promoters ($4 water, $12 pizzas, no shade, woefully inadequate security) created a crucible. Opportunistic aggro bands who were getting rich off stoking (pointless) white male rage leaned into their messages even more during the festival, potential consequences of their self-serving actions be damned. And while the members of the rioting crowd are not blameless for their actions — not even remotely close; much of what they did is horrific, in particular an unthinkable number of reported (and unreported) sexual assaults — their manipulators created the perfect storm to misdirect their rage and stoke those horrors. Again, it would take an intentionally and willfully myopic view not to see a direct parallel to today.
But in spite of being an abject disaster, Woodstock ‘99 did not bring an end to festival culture; in fact, festivals have thrived in the 20 years since. And in recent years, the Fyre Festival has easily taken the “infamous festival” crown from Woodstock ‘99. The Fyre Festival’s failure was mostly funnier, mostly lighter; yes, the documentaries about it featured a handful of actual victims, but they also featured charlatans and vapid rich kids and an unceasing comedy of hubris errors. Reliving and vilifying the Fyre Festival didn’t require facing the uncomfortable realities of reliving and vilifying Woodstock ‘99. Which, again, is why it remains infamous, but not infamous enough.
Also on July 22nd: Big Top Pee Wee and Caddyshack 2 both hit theaters (1988)… Martika’s single Toy Soldiers hit number one (1989)… Jeffrey Dahmer was arrested (1991)… OJ Simpson pleaded “absolutely 100% not guilty” to murder (1994)… North hit theaters (1994)… The Daily Show premiered on Comedy Central (1996)… the series finale aired of the sitcom Ellen (1998)… Len’s single Steal My Sunshine was released (1999)
Everything old is new again
A look at the reboots, revivals, throwbacks, retro insights, and nostalgia in the news.
A sealed copy of Super Mario 64 for Nintendo 64 just broke a world record when it sold for $1.56 million at auction. And that was just a few days after a sealed copy of The Legend of Zelda had broken the record by selling for $870,000. I really shouldn’t have ever opened my video games as a kid.
TAG Heuer teamed up with Nintendo to create a Mario-themed smartwatch. The watches cost $2,150 and sold out immediately on release yesterday.
Fisher-Price has released a line of Run-DMC Little People. They’re currently sold out online.
Vanilla Ice says the ‘90s were the last great pop culture decade and the iPhone is responsible for the once and future death of pop culture.
In possibly the least surprising reboot ever, MTV is bringing back Cribs.
Cristela Alonzo has been named the host of the rebooted version of Legends of the Hidden Temple on the CW.
Former pro wrestler “Mr. Wonderful” Paul Orndorff, who was in the main event of the very first WrestleMania, passed away at age 71.
Throwbacks and recommendations
Michael Winslow of Police Academy fame has resurfaced in one of the strangest ways possible: By auditioning for America’s Got Talent. That link takes you to his five-minute audition video.
Nickelodeon has released a trailer for a Smash Bros.-style brawl video game featuring their IP — meaning fights between characters from shows like TMNT, Rugrats, Ren & Stimpy, SpongeBob SquarePants, and more. The game comes out this fall on all major video game platforms.
Thanks for reading!
-Sam